Zoom Campaign - Dome Tour, Penang

This is my baby.As been said by Ryz.
Kali ni aku bebetul busy. Bukan main2. Aku pun tak menyangka apa yang akan berlaku. Theres a lot of thing in my mind and i have to be super woman, which means i have to settle everything super fast and super smooth. Banyak gile hal berlaku since the first day of setup. And i want to say congratulations to the guys because they manage to bring the Dome up in 16hrs. Aku masih ingat pada hari first setup, where all the local crew dtg. Sume dtg gelak2,suke2. Dalam hati aku.sonok2 la skrg..ko tgu jap lg. And ape yang aku ramalkan betol2 terjadi, bile start nak load kan sand bag, macam nak pitam pun ada aku tgk. Ehehehe. FYI, Penang is very hot. So guys, dont be shock if you see me darker than before. Well.self tanning.

The second day is the most busy day for me. I have to do lots of phone call, and meet lots of people at the site. Then, i have to buy lots of thingiews and went to lots of place. Percaya la aku main blasah je jln kat Penang. Tapi so far tak sesat jauh sgt. But on the second day, two bad news. One, bapak Halim meninggal dunia (innalillah), second, mak abg lan masuk ICU. In one day, two times aku g airport hantar dorg. Aku sedih masa hantar halim,tapi biasala pelakon terhebat kan. And this event is the first event yang aku sama-sama stay dengan dorg 24hrs. For 2 harini je, aku hanya tido 3 jam. Wow kan? Kami akan habis keje jam 6pg then kul 8 hp aku akan berdering2,panggilan dari sume orang yang terlibat. And aku tak rasa letih sgt wlaupun kurang tido, kurang makan, kurang rehat. Aku makan sekali sehari je kat sini! Wahaha!

Actually, I am a bit happy. Because the stress of work make me less thinking about other thingiews in life. Aku tak mesej2 langsung dengan amat n madi. Gile konsentret pasal keje. Mesti dorg ni merajuk dengan aku nanti. Ahaha. Sorry la kawan. And, aku pun tak payah nak layan sangat ex aku tu. Suprsingly, dia tetibe cam kejap2 cari. Kalau aku tak reply, he'll call me straight. wahh!! AND DIA NAK BUYKAN AKU SWEATER FERRARI CAP PUMA!!!! Ahahaha. Aku da slalu tgk dia ber behaviour begini. Kalau ikutkan aku sebagai seorang wani, memang aku da belasah je. Tapi sebab kali ni aku rasa cam nak jadi Wani yang lain, so aku kata no need. I can buy on my own. Wah,ayat sensengan. Aku nak dia tau, aku bole survive la! Tenz! So, hari ini adalah hari first event. Pada jam 10 pg nanti brmula lah segala kekecohan. Maka baik je lah aku g tido and recharge. good morning every one!

its gonna be me??

haha..addicted dgn blog nmpk gayanya ni.But somehow,ok la.Release sikit segala ketensenan kat dlm pale ni.

Finally,my ex accept the decision of changing the love to friendship.After an hour of crying and begging session.I cant help myself,I might be strong when i am not with him.But whenever he's around,i will burst out.

So yesterday,i woke up early.Around 10.Then at 2pm.I decided to go to office and print out sum stuff.But the internet was so slow,i cudnt do anything.At 4pm,Fazrozen called and said he's at my apartment.Emm.ok..So i went out wit him.And talked.

I asked him what is about her that he craze about,but dgn slamber nye dia menjawab,tak suke pun,layan je.Dush!Itu lagi sakit hati.Tapi yg lebih sakit hati is,pemahaman tentang org sekeliling about wat happen between us.

I dont have problems with my side,everybody knew how bad he had been before.But from his side.Sume org mcm salah kan aku.They said aku yg cemburu tak tentu pasal,cemburu buta,terburu-buru.I feel like i want to shout and said,do you know what he had done?He betrayed the relationship,cheating and unfaithful and you guys still wants to defend him?How bout me?Dont i have any rights?Dont i have any feelings?Tak boleh ke aku nak menegakkan diri sendiri?Aku sgt terasa.And secara tak sengaja aku tertahu yang mak dia tak berkenan dgn dressing aku walaupun dia rasa aku ni agak rajin.Tezz..jem gile.Bukan nak mengata,tapi tak baik tau kata anak org.nak berkenan tak berkenan.Mak aku tak penah pun cakap bende tak baik pasal anak dia.Walaupun mak aku tau anak mak cik faridah tu macam mana.tapi dia takpernah pun nak ckp tak berkenan ke apa apa ke.Masa mula2 kenal dulu tu lain la.Kan aku da terlaser kat dia,mak u tu nak cakap anak org,dia tau tak anak dia macam mana.Tapi when i think about it,dia dari Palong.A bit kampung.so cara pemikiran lain kot.Mak aku sama je mcm aku,wont care and bother much about others.Lantak korg la.

He stay at my place until morning.We did a lots of talking.He cooked maggi for me.Packed my stuff and luggage to penang(i was sleeping).And dia kemas bilik aku juga yer.Ala baik nya.Hmm.

But persetujuan untuk berkawan sahaja tu betul betul melegakan aku.I cant stand him begging for me to accept him anymore.And aku ingat aku kuat.Tapi aku salah.Aku slalu je bersedih sbnarnya.Tapi kontrol.Taknak org tau.Hope i will get better soon.I also told him that i am so glad i have lots of work to do,so i wont be thinking about him and our problem so much.He dont like that idea.Of course he dont,that is almost means that i dont want to think about him.

For now,aku harap sume akan bertambah lebih baik.I dont want to be sad and jadi gile sbb bende ni.And semoga sepanjang ke beradaan aku di Penang ni mampu membantu.

alalala...

maka..kawan aku dah merajuk dgn aku harini sbb aku tak letakkan nama dia masa post yang first.wahaha...ok..aku ader satu kwn yg bernama rafi ni..bukan nak meng exxagerate atau kiss ass..tapi dia ni eventho sumtimes he's a bit annoying,tapi dia juga adala antara mereka yg selalu berada di samping ku ketika aku memerlukan sesapa...dan aku tau dia akan rindu aku bile aku lama sangat tak masuk opis.sebab da takde org dia nak kenakan or nak cari gado..and takde orang lain akan cakar dia selain aku..ehehehehe..i love you rafi..trust me i do appreciate u...mmuah mmuah paris...

owh please!!

maka ketika aku sudah ngantuk semula selepas terjaga jam 5 pg...tintibe aku terdengar bunyi siren polis..ingatkan ape..jaf g....orang nak kawen..siap 10 biji kete bunyikan hon yg pelbagai!!!tezz!!!da takleh tdo balik!!!

What happen?

so now..its been..5 days after the break up..

And now i am very sure,this blog will be the place where i can dump every story which is related to him.

He still begging. And every time i read all the love messages, my eyes will filled wit tears and my brain is telling my heart, dont be fooled by those.He will never change.

Yea baby,be strong.

My mum text me the other day. Asking me,what happen.OMG!He really met my mum and confess and admit everything?I dont believe this.In my heart, "Fazrozen!ko nk kna bakar ke??"Well,he always have the guts.Since the very first time i met him,he always brave to meet my parent.

And then Cipok called and asked issit Shera told me about what happen that night until i decided to move on.Suprised.Everyone accused her,because she's the only one there.If they only knew.I don't understand these guys.They can kill sumone just because that sumone tell the truth.Footballers and honesty,cannot n never will combine.Thats true.They are hot but brainless.Sorry guys,I love u guys but i have to say this.And yet,there many girls are falling for them.For me,I just love man who are tough wit a sexy butt,and emm..proud face which,I only can found that on a sportsperson. By the way,I am not a bitch who is messing around because he's popular,I have my own reputation in Seremban,and if you guys still remember,i Dumped a hotter one before i met my ex.

Shera told me that one of the team member called her and membebel about her blog.we were shocked!a footballer read blogs??ahaha..well,he's always been sweet anyway.lalala..damn he's hot!!(u know who) akekeke..by the way,that team member was mad because shera wrote sumthing bout him and his gf.After i read the post,Ok this is my opinion,(jgn mengamuk ye kak)..ok she's a bit too far,but sumhow u dont need to serang la babe,theres a comment box right?just maki her there la.But what happen is his gf called shera,and blackmailed her.wow!And i am very sure shera will be banned forever.who cares!

The other thing,that hottie also blaming shera for what happen between me and fazrozen!ahahaha..that's funny..OK,here's the thing,yes shera did wrote sumthing on the wall,but she didnt knew that i followed her blog.So its not her fault.Everyone from Stad,knew it very well I'm a mind ur own shit type of a human being.I just wont bother about everything.Her blog did help me for 3%.All the confirmation about the cheating were done by sumone else.And i am going to write something about footballer later.EHEHEHE(evil laugh)

Its hard for me to be 2 different person in a time.There will be a minute i'll be sad,and then i will get back to reality and be the old Wani.Am trying my best to not showing everyone that i am frustrated and sad and if i cud,i want to cry for the whole week!Eventho i hav tonne of works to do,that doesnt really help.So what i did is i went hang out with friends.

LoTs of things reminded me of him.Curve,superheroes,marche,cineleisure,bed,table,towel, and bla bla bla...Damn..i hate this part..

He called again last night. Sumhow, i realized how much i love him. But,i also knew i deserved sumone better. Or maybe him, improve to be better. Do u remember Mr.Jones? Ok, i like him so much but since i broke up,i dont have any feelin towards him anymore. The heart is fully empty now.

I told Fazrozen today.."lets be friend first,if ader jodoh ader la.then we willl know whether u really love me or u just like me.If u kept begging and said u love me.u need me.bla bla bla..but in the same time u date other girls.thats no use la"..of course he wont agreed.Sorry my love,but that is how its going to be.I'm in no mood for love.

So now..the question is...WHERE CAN I FIND A BETTER VERSION OF HIM??

A song for the ex.

RUNNING BACK -JESSICA MAUBOY FT FLORIDA
(Verse 1) These days you barely even say my name

Like you don’t really feel the same

I’m wondering whats to blame

These nights, I fall asleep wondering where you are

It feels like we’re falling apart

And it’s totally breaking my heart

Cause if bein’ with you means being alone

And never knowing when you’re comin’ home

Then I guess I’m better off on my own

(Chorus)

But I cant move on

Cause that means forgettin, forgettin, everything we had Instead

I keep running, keep running, I keep running back

Cause I keep forgettin, forgettin,

you treat me so bad

So I keep on comin, keep comin,

I keep comin back

I keep comin back (I keep running back)

And I keep running back (I keep comin back)

I keep comin back (I keep running back)

And I keep comin,

I keep running back

(Verse 2)

My friends say that I should leave you behind

And stop wasting all my time

They tell me that

I’m out of my mind

But I know that what we both share is real

And that I been willing to deal

With the way that you’re making me feel

Cause if being with you means being alone

And never knowin’ when you’re coming home

Then I guess I’m better off on my own



Chorus



(Rap) Ma ma ma mama caught up

We not all heard the same story

Just different authors this book crazy

Always a lady looking for love where there’s a maybe

We might could be together

They fight to be together

Aight to be together

Shorty yeah he cheated

You say you don’t need it

Turn around and leave it

Oh he back next week Fuss…

Fight And then the whole thing repeat like nothing ever happened

Dat was just rapping

No publishing

Shorty you knew that he ain’t got the same government

Lil mama can’t move on

But it’s her fault she struggling

She can’t…move…on

Chorus

But I cant move on

Cause that means forgettin, forgettin, everything we had

Instead I keep running, keep running,

I keep comin back

I keep comin back (I keep running back)

And I keep running back (I keep comin back)

I keep comin back (I keep running back)

And I keep comin, I keep running back

I keep comin back (I keep running back)

And I keep running back (I keep comin back)

I keep comin back (I keep running back)

And I keep comin, I keep running back… …

To you

The end.

It must have been love, but its over now...

It must have been good,

But i lost it somehow..

I am now listening to Roxette,it must have been love. Filling with tears, in my room.

24 hours ago, i had change my status to single.Yes, i broke up with my 4 years bf. After a long time of misery,headaches but yet full of love,i finally made up my mind.

There is no more Miss venill and mr fazrozen.

Many people was surprised, because i used to survive through all the pain that caused by him.Especially his friends. Well i guess not anymore. I had enuff. I've been patience and believe that love conquer all. And now,because i love him so much, i decided to let him go and be free. It was a bit painful,of course.

The main reason, he being so helpful to help hi ex scandal when she want to watch the game,and they had dinner,and he lied. He is stupid by thinking there's no one will see and tell me about it.

2hrs before that, we were planning about seeing each other today because he miss me so muc. But later, i got the bad news. Once i had confirmed the things, i gave him a call and asked him few questions before i said, "ITS OVER SAYANG." At first he said I'm crazy and doing stupid decisions because he didn't do anything wrong(of course he wont admit). But i keep saying things like "i don't care if you want to tell the whole world that I'm accusing w/o proof,but i knew deep inside u,u knew that u r the main reason y i choose to leave u". And i am very firm this time. That is when he start to cuak.

1am, he arrived at Sri Warisan. We discuss and talked until 7, and i didn't change my mind.He need to learn that not everything can be simply be taken care of. My Fazrozen, he always hold on to this thought, lying to me so that we wont get into fight, or lying because he scared of me. And I've told him many times, be honest and tell the truth. But he wont listen. So this time, i decided to teach him a lesson.

I don't know how to react actually. I was hurt for what he had done, but in the same time, i dont know whether I'm sad, or I'm fine. I don't feel like crying. But i did cried when we were in Sri Warisan. He kissed my hand, my cheek, my lips, my forehead and even my foot like there is no tomorrow. Well,of course, there is no tomorrow of US. He hugged me and keep saying he dont want to lose me,which i said,its too late. He cried and forgot that he is a guy. He should thought about this before he did all the stupid things. I know, he is very comfortable with the situation of me not leaving him all this while after whatever he did. But he forgot, that i gave up to him, and he forgot a stupid mistake can cause him, losing me. He forgot that he had hurt me too much and its over my limit of patience.

Today, he still text me and said how much he love me and theres no one else but me. I've been telling myself to be strong. He also explaining that theres nothing between him and that girl. And surprisingly, he admit that this is all his fault.

Of course i'm sad. Its love. For 4 years i've been loving him and whatever happen last year make us stronger. Even tho i keep saying that he is stupid, but deep in my heart, my love for him has no boundaries.

Just now, he called and said he miss me n he love me, and he will be leaving to penang. For me, everything is like three hours late.

And now, i hav to admit, i am sad, broken hearted, lost, alone, empty, getting crazy and started crying over the break up. And as always, lots of no answer questions in my mind.

To top all that, i miss him, hate to love him, crying over him, but still not changing my mind. And cudt wait to get the office so that i can do my things and not weeping.

It will be the hardest moment in my life. And i am ... in pain.

the beginning

so..hi..this is the first time I'm writing a blog...the main reason??so that i can express the feeling which i cud not express in real life..there are too many things happen..too many..especially last year...last year has become the worse year that I'd ever have for 23 years of my life..but i have to admit that it make me stronger..and become a better person... so this year..is the year to change everything..to correct all the mistakes...and i want it to be a wonderful year...but first..i want to introduce you..who is VENILLIA

THE LIST..

1.i am 24 this year..a bit terrified with the number..but trying to act cool..keep telling myself..do something,get something,improve something...and it become a bit pressure..because..i am the person who likes to think more than i shud..that habit,sometimes its good,but sum times it makes people sick..especially my boyfriend..of course...


2.i am the third children in the family..the smallest..and the most unpredictable..the softest..for mak..I'm her everything..at first i thought she loves her sons more than she loves me..until one day when i accidentally read her diary,and i knew she loves me so much as i am the only daughter that can share everything with her..i love my dad too..but sumtimes his behavior can cause me headaches.by the way,i dont know how to show my love to him..wow,that's bad eyy...then i have a brother,a sister which i haven't talk for years,a little brother who can make me do anything for him..i love my niece,tica and afrinna..they were so cute and adorable..i wish my children will be as cute as them.


3.graduated from uitm,in diploma of mass communication..lots of people said..suits me..seems that i am a very outgoing person.


4.werk..emm..for now i am a production coordinator in capital production..well its not a well known company but i think we have more than enuff..i did the live sounds,waterscreen in putrajaya,MISA,Launching of eye on Malaysia,and many more..i cudnt remember..i still remember the first day i came to work..i didn't prepared,not even my resume..but Ryz,my GM,accept me..i start working right away..that is how i met zul aka Hercules..my idol in my working life..he taught me about lots of things which is important in event management..and the most part that i like,he kept me going..every time i lose my confidence..he always gave me "kata kata hikmah" in sarcastic way...he..well..it works..i had a crush towards him once,because he always there,he made me stronger..but then..i cant stand his sarcastic jokes,n i started to get emotional,then i quit..well..for a month..damien define it as "my itchy backside moment"..wahaha...but thanks to hercules..he made me comeback..and i'm still here..until now..and still liking to werk with him more than anyone else..ehehe..no more crush..just work..that's better eyy??


5.OMG..my boyfriend is at five? ahhaha...so..now..my love life..i have a crazy boyfriend..at least he drove me crazy..not for him..for his sumtimes irrational behavior..i always thought,i had a wonderful life,i love my job and I'm doing whatever i had planned to do..but..he is the spoiler..he gave me lots of headache due to his unprofessional cheating and lies..tenzz!!!!


6.friendship..i dont have muc trusted friends nowadays..last year,4 of my closest friend stab me from the bak..wow..sakit tau!since that on..i just keep the friends that i have now,,i dont trust ppl so muc.i have lots of boyfriends in my phone than girlfriends..the girls is only z,zati,nomi,phea,she,sara,joji,aina..itu aja kot..owh..lets not forget..the sisterhood of hiszness...juju elle n aimi--those are my loves ones..for the boys..sham,amir,amat,bedul,ajim,ery,ezani..this guys were awesome..they can really cope with my unpredictable behavior..and they always there to listen,to courage,to help wherever i need it...i love u guys!


thats it la...actually i have lots more to write but my eyes cannot open!ahhaha..that is what elle use to say bak in uitm when we are sleepy in the class..i miss those times..now i always busy...with my werkk..i rarely sleep in my place..so thats all for now..i will write again..the next title is about the events that i did...waaa..shliff!!!